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More mythical monsters

Saturday, 18 February 2017  |  Admin

Okay so last time around we talked about vampires, zombies and werewolves and how they could be kept at bay by wearing the appropriate MPS bracelet. But there's more to mythical monsters than those. I feel kind of bad banging on about such negative vibes just after St. Valentine's Day. However, mythical monsters - like time - wait for no man. Moreover they show no special deference to the blessed saints. Neither, for that matter, do they show an iota of respect  for the Church, the Queen, the Pope or the Chief Rabbi.

And of course they like to slip in when our guard is down - like Trojan viruses - or when we're distracted by the great festivities around us. In the case of Britain, "great festivities" means not so much religion but more like the venerable sporting events of the Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race and the Grand National at Aintree, both of which lie ahead in the not-too-distant future.

So what might these nasty little beasties get up to while the distracted punters are staking wads of cash on the G-G's and the ladies are swooning over the muscle-bound rowers who happen to  have caught their eye?

Well first of all, they might unleash a ghoul upon us. Now, to be honest, I've never really been entirely sure just what a ghoul actually is. I remember a friend of mine in my primary school wandering aimlessly around the playground saying "Let's have a war - the boys against the ghouls." But I'm not quite convinced that he actually meant it the way it sounded.

Then there was my pompous friend from Eton - fresh from a visit to the College of Arms where his father was a herald - telling me that his family crest included Gules Argent. I asked him if that was any relative of Rod Argent, but he was not amused. (In fact he was more than a little confused.)

But I digress. My point here is simply that whatever these gulies might do - no I don't mean THOSE gulies ladies - it's important to have a good defence against them. So, to this worthy end, Magnetic Products Store is offering an anti-Ghouls magnetic bracelet to keep them old monsters at bay!

OK that's as maybe, but what about the Golem? Well bear in mind that there are two types of Golem. There is ancient Golem of Jewish legend and mythology on the one hand, who is actually not so bad. But there is also the more recent Golem from Tolkien's Lord of the Rings who really is an evil so-and-so. But have no fear: MPS also offers a Golem defence.

Finally if you're worried about warlocks - which means not "male magician" or wizard, but rather "deceiver" - then you're in luck too because MPS also offers a magnetic bracelet that repels warlocks.

So whether its one of the two G's or the big W that scares the bejesus out of you, don't worry mate - Magnetic Products Store has it covered!